About Me

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Saint Joseph, MO, United States
I'm a stay at home Mom of two children and I have the unique privilege of being able to homeschool both of them. I am a stepmother to two older daughters one who is going to college. I enjoy shopping, baking, cooking, cleaning, organizing, running, clowning, making soap, playing piano and lately painting with ASCP paint! I am learning to enjoy the little things in life and make the most of it...clinging to my Savior through the tears that life brings and enjoying his GRACE He gives us every day! Thanks for stopping by!

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Learning Patience?

I knew that it was going to be an interesting night when I laid my Ellianna down for the night. She was hacking and nose was running as most are right now with ragweed being absolutely ridiculous. I was hoping that it would be an uneventful evening with me starting the first day of school the next day with both children but that was not the case.

I prepared myself for a long night but comforted myself with the idea that if worse comes to worse we could adjust the schedule. About 4am I realized that no adjusting was going to make this day go well. I was just going to have to really drink the caffeine to get through the day. As the morning came I realized that Ellie was going to have to go to the doctor AGAIN. I called and they could get her in and I was thrilled (still in my mind adjusting my schedule) that is what you do when you homeschool you constantly adjust your schedule to make it all miraculously "happen" Getting out to the car with my trusty ballcap and as I get ready to put Ellie in her carseat I notice a HUGE STINKIN GAPING HOLE IN MY VAN WINDOW!!!! I'm so annoyed I don't even have time to react. I just pick up my cell and tell my husband I need him home now because we now officially need a ride to the doctor.

Two hours later as I'm finally on the way home driving my husband's car and now I have wonderful marvelous meds and the doctor has now told me that he thinks Ellianna is developing asthma I start to become very irritated. How does one even get glass out of a completely shattered window and sweep the huge pile of broken glass off the street without getting ran over (let me tell you don't try wearing flip flops) O.k. before you all say "duh" let me just say that this was my first time with vandalism and such so I was a little "out of it shall we say" I did however get it done without getting ran over but I certainly was stared at and people were a bit annoyed but trust me they would NOT want to have stopped and given me a hard time I was so angry I think I would have taken ANYONE on!!!!

As the day progressed and I had to take my car into the autobody shop I became more annoyed (what a waste of time and money this was!) My whole first day of school completely wasted all because someone threw a beer bottle out the window and then I went on my own little tyriad in my head...went like this "first of all why in the world aren't beer bottles made up of plastic? YOu don't even hear of someone breaking a window by throwing a bottle of Dr. Pepper at it do you? Second, why did they have to aim it at my van? ARen't I nice, don't I let people go in front of me who are waiting with one item while I have 50? Why did someone have to pick on me? Then I moved on to blame and the horrible parenting this person must have received "who teaches their kids to throw things out the window? Who teaches their kids to drink and drive? Who teaches their kids to do all those things at the SAME STINKING TIME AND HIT a minivan that is owned by a homeschool Mom who has only had four hours of sleep and just wanted today to be a great first day of school? Huh what about that?

However, on the outside I was cool. Saying thank you to the people at the autobody shop and almost crying with gratefulness when they said that it would be done today (which it was and all shiny and clean I might add:)) Just telling my kids that tomorrow was a new day and even though we missed enrichment classes I would get Trey to soccer somehow......THEN the unthinkable happened.....my husband called and told me while I was at soccer with Trey that the lettuce we had just bought at Sam's on Sunday was frozen on the bottom level of our fridge and what did I suggest they eat for a veggie instead. THAT WAS IT!!! THAT WAS THE LAST STRAW!!! I completely lost it! You would have thought that I was told that someone had come by and blown out all the windows on all three of our cars I went CRAZY!!!!!

Today however has been a very good day. Car fixed, answered prayers of a friend, Ellianna is better and did well in preschool today and ballet and Miss Dot got to do a very fun thing for some great kids tonight. So, why in heaven's name did I lose it at such a little thing after all the big things seemed to just glaze me over?? REAlly, I believe I was just brewing inside waiting to blow trying to handle everything on my own as usual and realized that there is no one waiting with a great big list to see if I completed my whole list today. The sun will shine, the world will spin if I leave a few things uncrossed for a day and in all reality a broken window is such a little thing compared to some really devastating things people go through every day. I was grateful however for the sun rising today and my "bad day" being erased and God giving me a new beautiful day with "no mistakes in it...well, not yet anyway"

May I remember on my bad days that God knows what is going on He is not suprised by what happens and He was testing me in my "pressure cooker" I did better than before but still.....I have a way to go.

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