Today, this week, this weekend....are overwhelming the amount of things, the amount of people, the projects that are far behind. Today I started that feeling that I get when I get overwhelmed. That nagging, crazy, insane feeling that means that I set these unattainable goals and get angry at myself for not completing them. So, I'm sitting down, I'm eating lunch and I'm taking a teeny break to glance into God's word because...the floors, the bathrooms, the cooking...the laundry....there will be plenty of it left for tomorrow and I can only accomplish today what I can. I have a five hour meeting this evening to meet with a consultant that we hired two years ago that will give us his "very expensive" opinion on what to do with our store to make it stand out in our town. Very difficult for change, very difficult for me to go out of my "comfort zone" Very difficult for me to do things that I'm not comfortable with and to approach life differently than I have before.
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her; Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
When I'm going "crazY" with my unattainable goals do I really model that behavior? Do my children call me "blessed" when I'm screaming about how many times can one leave a spoon in the movie room or lay the dirty clothes BESIDE the hamper?? Yes, those things are irritating and should be corrected but might there be a better way than SCREAMING about it? So, today I'm not being idle we are moving right along in the projects that need to be done but I won't get all the "insane cleaning" and perfect house that I'm dreaming of...today...and probably not tomorrow either...but that's o.k.? That's something hard for me to accept. So here are a few things that I just decided to enjoy with my daughter today and my son.
1. Helping Trey with his math EVEN though we have gone over this a HUNDRED million times
2. NOT FREAKING out that he slept through his alarm again and he's getting started with his homeschooling 45 min LATE
3. and the fact that he YELLED at his little sister...
4. Not getting annoyed that Ellianna didn't know where a certain "baby" letter was that she should know.
So, we made rabbit sandwiches and put some "fake" flowers out and now I'm getting ready to prepare my house and my spirit for the rest of the day. Trying to remember to breathe in and out, to enjoy this day and ALL the experiences in it instead of wanting to fast forward....to just BE and live in the moment and all that there is to offer!
May His name be praised!
Next week...spring cleaning and decorating!!! YEAH!!!!!