About Me

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Saint Joseph, MO, United States
I'm a stay at home Mom of two children and I have the unique privilege of being able to homeschool both of them. I am a stepmother to two older daughters one who is going to college. I enjoy shopping, baking, cooking, cleaning, organizing, running, clowning, making soap, playing piano and lately painting with ASCP paint! I am learning to enjoy the little things in life and make the most of it...clinging to my Savior through the tears that life brings and enjoying his GRACE He gives us every day! Thanks for stopping by!

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Finding Time to Read

Lately, I have been reading several books that I have been meaning to read for about two years.  Some are new but I just wanted to share some books that have really been talking to me lately.  I get so burdened by the things in this world and the trials of this life that I just carry it with me.  So, perspective is of upmost importance so these books have been quite a source of joy to me lately.

The one I'm working on now is:

1.So Long Insecurity: You've Been a Bad Friend to Us: Beth Moore

2. Sparkly Green Earrings: Catching the Light at Every Turn Melanie Shankle

3.  Dancing with my Father by Sally Clarkson

4.  This Mission of Motherhood: Sally Clarkson

5.  Don't Make me Count To Three Ginger Plowman

6.  One Thousand Gifts Ann Voskamp (I'm trying to make it a habit continually...been working on this for about two years..have read it through several times.)

7.  Grace for the Good Girl by Emily P Freeman

and one I have bought for my stepdaughters but going to be reading first:

8.  Graceful-Letting go of your try-hard life by Emily P Freeman

Another one I just started

9.  You're Made for a God-Sized Dream by Holley Gerth

I know, I know...I probably shouldn't read three books at the same time but I do....I didn't even tell you the books I read for teaching my children:)

Anyway, just thought that this summer you all might want some good books to read...and those are the ones so far that I'm enjoying!

I'm off to spend a day on me myself and I to celebrate my 39th birthday :( That's right...I'm one step closer to middle age :(

Goals for the rest of the year are as follows:
1.  Keep sanity during this move and the squishing a family of five and six (one will go back to college) into a two bedroom house while our house is being built.
2.  Completely rid myself of my "constant stuff buying" self...
3. Save more money with coupons
4.  Take time for myself more...not feeling guilty buying clothes, shoes etc....I'm a better Mommy when I feel better.
5.  Eating better
6.  Running a half this fall.
7.  Learning to sit and smell the roses
8.  Communicate better with my son....12 and 13 are soo hard...there are days I wonder if I will make it:)
9.  Teach my children to love people not things :)
10. Have a house full of joy not strife :)

Have a GREAT day! Hoping that this birthday will go better than most...usually there are disasters that occur on my birthday:(

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

The Hiccups of Life

I dislike my birthday...no, I really do.  Every year it seems it is shadowed by disaster...two years ago it was shattered by the Joplin tornado where four of my family members almost lost their lives.  Last year it seemed to be shadowed by the deaths of several friends parents....and this year another deadly tornado the day before my birthday....I now approach my birthday in kind of a "close my eyes" kind of way.

The world is a scary place...such sorrow, such cruelty...but out of the ashes God makes himself known.  I will never forget after the Joplin tornado and we went to look at where my niece and her newborn baby were pulled from the wreckage and all around me helping were churches...everywhere....the children of God helping:)  When I drove through I didn't take pictures....it seemed rude...like I was intruding on their pain...I only took pictures where my niece was...and where no one else was around....I can't imagine how I would feel to see people taking a million pictures of my pain and my belongings and memories scattered all around.

In the darkest of dark nights people surround us to help us through...in the coldest of days when you feel you can't make it...God holds us up...and helps us see to another day...and in the morning you feel a glimmer that you might make it...but what do you do in the Hiccup of life??? Right now....we have a big hiccup with the people buying our house.  It's not their fault....its a hiccup that they didn't anticipate either....its a great big pain honestly for both sides...but it means building my new house is put off yet another month...it means living in a two bedroom rental for another month...it means...waiting...and if its one thing I have learned in this process..its that God wants me to WAIT....WAIT.....WAIT....and just so you know....I'M HORRIBLE AT WAITING!  So, after I cried yesterday....because that of course makes it ALL BETTER:( and inhaled a chocolate bar (creating yet another problem :(  I remembered that the only thing I could change was my attitude to the Hiccups of life.....I'm still moving....they still want my house....we are still building ....and it will be awesome....but for now...we just have to wait....and pack and pack and have a big sale....:)

Yesterday after that phone call I had some attitude problems with my children, got a trailer to do some moving where the lights wouldn't work, have a house that looks like a train hit it, have an antenna sitting on the ground after our storm blew through, and a fence that needs to be repaired, just washed my car that got rained on in a fifteen second rainstorm (of course) and forgot once again to get something at the grocery store...really, how hard is it to remember BUTTER?! not to mention all the trials we have had this week with our van....but the hiccups of life are the hardest I think....can't really call people and cry about the trailer lights not working, or having to start your new house a month later....kind of feel selfish calling and complaining about that when so many people are hurting and have some real problems...but that is when I feel we sometimes need it most...for the little things...for the hiccups...

I still keep singing this son and lately even more:

Give Me Jesus-Jeremy Camp
In the morning, when I rise
In the morning, when I rise
In the morning, when I rise

Give me Jesus\Give me Jesus\Give me Jesus\You can have all this world,
Just give me Jesus.

When I am alone,
When I am alone,
When I am alone,\Give me Jesus.

When I come to die,
When I come to die,
When I come to die,
Give me Jesus.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

The Last Chapter

I said goodbye to my childhood home this week.  I started crying as I walked around the property.  I have lived there since 12.  I had highschool and college boyfriends come here to meet my parents...the man I would marry, sat on the front porch in my wedding gown getting pictures, brought my newborn baby boy here, moved here after the death of my husband and watched my son grow up here as well...it was bittersweet....

but now my parents are ten minutes away from me and Dad has a lot less to take care of.  After his heart attack last year this place was just way to much for him to take care of.  I cried but I know that there are many happy memories to come.  So today we close the last chapter of this book...and now we move on to a new one:)

Have a GREAT day!

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Last day of being FIVE

I've been trying to make sure that I'm recording lasts:) It always seems to me that all of the sudden our kids quit doing some of the favorite things they used to do and we miss it...we don't record it! So, today...even though I should be packing....I'm celebrating the LAST day of being FIVE.  We won't have another child turn FIVE again...and this will be the last time she celebrates her birthday in this house:)  The only house that she has known...but I am so happy that the people buying it love it as much as I did and I know they will take awesome care of it..so...celebrate with me...my E's last day of being five:)

Tomorrow we celebrate being six...but today we celebrate our last day of five:)

DAnce Recital and Moving On

This past Saturday was dance recital...we have driven to dance lessons every day for a week and I'm so tired.  Ellie woke up this past Wednesday very sick...not being able to breathe very well and every night since then she has been up hacking and hacking except for ONE night:)  So, to say I'm tired would be an understatement...nevertheless she was able to dance on Saturday and I was so proud of her:)

Even feeling horrible she did awesome!

Ellie after with her patient teacher

 I would show you my E's dance pictures but she was standing with her class and I'm not comfortable putting other people's children on my blog...people are crazy...this world is crazy and I just don't like doing that.

The whole way home from dance she hacked and hacked and threw up...that's the part they don't tell you about mother hood eh?? So, I drove as fast as I could to make it home...my son was impressed that I made an hour destination not take an hour:( oops!

So for mother's day (which is never my favorite day) I stayed home from church sleep deprived because of more constant hacking!

Anyway, we are getting over sickness...waiting for test results from allergy testing, waiting to hear about appt with ENT and Asthma specialist...and we are moving...and my parents move this week.  Honestly I don't even have time to be sitting here typing this!

As I was looking around in my garden last night I realized how many flowers I have planted and how much I'm going to miss them!

My other flowers haven't bloomed yet but I have so many! I hope the new owner will enjoy them...I feel bad because I really need to spend hours in my flower beds but pretty sure the new owners want me to move my stuff out of the house rather than not having weeds in the garden!

Hoping for a better nights sleep soon but for now I'm riding the caffeine train! Off to call the moving company and the rest of the world as we begin our GREAT adventure! Have a GREAT day!

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Living LIfe withOUT Fear

There are some things in this life that are hard for me to get over....make your own list in your mind...but mine are as follows:
1.  People that have wronged me (remember I'm not saying these are GOOD things)
2.  People that have wronged my children
3.  People that have wronged others
Yep! I've got a people problem it would appear eh?  However, my biggest problem is fear...fear of lots of things but I guess the biggest is that I fear waiting for the bottom to fall out....I live my life two ways...waiting...and enduring.

I've been reading the book Dancing with my Father...by Sally Clarkson...she also has a great book on motherhood...run out and buy them NOW!  She talks about how if we learn the spirit of joy as we walk through trials that we can embrace them with less stress because we are resting in the Father and that He is in complete control of our lives...if you need a mental picture (and I always do) I guess it would be like falling backwards into His hands and just allowing yourself to just...fall.  I also am continuing the Gifts and have a devotional by Ann Voskamp...again, go run and get them if you don't have them...its life changing!

Right now I'm on the mountain after a very long long long patient learning lesson.  I'm a bit fearful as I'm packing boxes that the deal will fall through on our house and we won't move and we won't build and that it is all just too much and God won't give me this gift....ridiculous really.  I'm His child no one loves me more than he does...but this fear that Satan puts in my mind all the time makes me live like a crazy person peering out from every corner just waiting to get hit over the head...this is NOT how God wants me to live.  Why can't I just accept that God has given me something GOOD and accept it with JOY instead of just waiting for the hit on the head!

To this day when I go through trials I can hear my childhood preachers in my head "When you go through trials evaluate if there is sin in your life, did you tithe, where are your priorities." I think without meaning to this message has been completely twisted in my head that basically if I'm going through a trial then God is punishing me and if there is a ray of sunshine it will be blacked out soon and God will be there standing over me saying "HA HA GOT YA!"  I know saying this out loud makes me sound insane but for whatever reason that seems to be the way I'm acting lately....so...here I go...stepping out with joy....stepping out on faith...accepting His good gift and letting it all go....of course in the back of my mind I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop....yep, I need lots of prayer:))))

Isaiah 26:3  You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast because he trust in you.

Better get to packing!!! Have a GREAT day!

Monday, May 6, 2013

It All Starts NOW

I have begun to dislike the month of May....for our family alone we celebrate three birthdays (Sarah, Ellie and me) we always have dance recital which means practice every single night the week leading up to it.  We have older children so all their friends are graduating or getting married:)  We also have a son in scouts and of course our daughter E has already had two award nights for the two outside activities she was involved in such as Awana and Upward...throw in the fact that my parents are moving and we are as well and we have a business trip in three weeks which means the whole house has to be packed up BEFORE and you have what I like to call "shrink into a ball and hide under the cover syndrome." Yep, I'm fully aware that I just typed a HUGE run on sentence but bear with me that I'm just a tad over stressed!

So, today the mission is to start packing, packing, packing...and finding more boxes:( Also I need to be finishing school with my oldest...and just so you know just because we home school doesn't mean he doesn't work hard.  I'm so sick of people telling him to his face that since he doesn't actually get up and go to a school building he doesn't work as hard....just for the record I make him finish ALL of his book...which I know for a fact doesn't happen in PUBLIC or PRIVATE school! He has teachers who teach him and real homework and real grades! GRRRRR! Anyway, climbing down off my soapbox now:)

This week I'm tempted to just really lose sight of what's important and fade away with the stress...I'm a get in there and grit your teeth kinda girl and get it done! We hear a bid back today on the plans for our house, things are set to go...I'm packing in three groups 1. Need now 2. Need in a few months 3. Need when we get to our new house.  We will be renting while the house is being built and learning how to get a long in very tight quarters.  We have already gone over this with our older children and they feel prepared to conquer it since they want a new house.  This week I'm trying to concentrate and say over and over again the words in Proverbs.

Prov. 3:5,6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.  Seek his will in all you do and he will show you which path to take.

The way the doors have opened have been amazing.  It is clear that this is the way in which God wants us to go...He never promised it would be easy...but He did promise that He would be with us...and for that I'm grateful.

This past week I have been reading a Proverbs every day to my children during Bible Time.  It is so important that they understand the wise instruction of following God's word.  We as Christians can get so caught up in length of skirts and shorts and movies and music...that we become judges of others instead of focusing on what God tells us to do.  I want my children to seek God and show that love to others...even those that are unlovely...there are times that I don't necessarily want a child visiting my home that isn't from our church or background....but if we can show them the love of God and how it is to eat at the table together and pray what better way to get them to see the true meaning of being a Christian.  I have never felt the pull of Satan against my children as I do now....we are truly in a battle.

Please pray for us as we start this journey...I know that Satan will attack us on every side.  Sometimes when we go through great trials people really rally around us with prayer but when you do something that is stressful yet fun and self induced the prayers don't come...I'm asking for prayer in advance...we have a lot of decisions to make and this summer will be challenging for all involved.

Have a blessed day!

Sunday, May 5, 2013

The Horse Party

The horses are READY

Party Favors

Time for silly photos!

Time for playdoh!

So ready to be six!

Now we paint!

Loved this!
Just to catch anyone up that doesn't know...our house sold...my parents house sold....we are building....life is changing at WARP speed....and the pressure is on...but when its all over and we are all settled...it will be SO WORTH IT!

In all that chaos my Ellie is getting ready to turn six and by the way...she's in love with horses:) This week the weather has thrown us a few curve balls but thankfully today it was warmer...no snow and it wasn't raining horribly...sooo

First off the cake...my E has a horrible allergy to corn...so the cake that was made for her had to be corn free...such as...no powdered sugar...that has corn in it...which I feel so stupid I did NOT even know! So....my amazing friend...figured out how to make it herself! I couldn't believe it either...

My E had decided that more than anything in this world she wanted a pair of cowgirl boots! Well, I'm not really a country girl and I don't own a pair of cowgirl boots at all:(  So, I asked some friends and bravely went where I haven't gone before...the BOOT store!  I walked in with my cute little rain boots and realized that I looked like a deer in headlights....country music filled the store with camo and orange everywhere! Finally I found the little kid section and decided on these babies:)

She was THRILLED! I have to say they are the cutest and they light up! That's right the hearts light up!!!!

So, it was time to decorate! I found these adorable cowboy boots to put favors in that the guests can later use as cups at Birthday Express.  Absolutely everything else was bought at Oriental Trading! I cannot find anything anywhere cheaper than they are:)

When the guests arrived I had them pick out their favorite boot with their favorite color bandana then we picked out our favorite pink mustaches! Then we were a little silly with some pics!  Now if I had had more time I would have had a better background!  However, this is how it all shook out so I will have to accept it and MOVE ON!

Since it was rainy and cloudy we played with playdoh, painted magnets and played pin the tail on the horse, opened presents and had cake and ice cream!  They said they had a blast...and I think they did!

Enjoy the pics!

Horse bubbles!

Pink mustaches:)